Chinese Wedding Traditions Start with Betrothal

When two people of Singapore Chinese descent decide to marry, a ritual begins to move them towards their wedding day. Everything must be done under auspicious circumstances and grace. A rich tradition has been created with all actions leading to the special day.

When two people decide to get married, this is a joining of two families, not just a joining of the bride and groom. There are special responsibilities for both sides of the family from the beginning.

On the day that has been chosen for the betrothal, the groom’s family will present the first gift, called the grand gift, to the bride’s family. The two families at this time will give their blessing to the wedding and there will be many items in the gift basket. They will include token money that is wrapped in red, sweet meats, sugar and other items that are for good luck and prosperity.

The token money will be from $99 to $999 because the number 9 is said to symbolize forever and this is to wish the bride and groom happiness forever. Loose tea is also given because the family is in hopes that the couple will have as many children as there are leaves in the tea.

A double happiness cake will also be a part of the grand gift so that the bride’s family can distribute pieces of it to friend’s and family with wedding announcements to let them know of the betrothal.

The grand gift will also contain even numbered items as a symbol of the fact that “good things double.” Everything around the betrothal will be blessings that the couple will have a long and prosperous life together.

The wedding basket is always two tiered to let everyone know that this is important and it is packed with many things for abundance and prosperity.

Another important part of the betrothal is the bride’s prize. In Western tradition this is called, the dowry. This will happen as the wedding is being negotiated or it may be left up to the groom’s family to name a price. Money will be given in a red packet and it can be anywhere between $600 and $2,000 or more depending on the family’s economic situation.

The groom’s side of the family will usually give a little more than the agreed upon price and part of this ritual is that the bride’s family will give a little of the money back to show that they appreciate the fact that the groom’s family has been so generous.

Next, the bride’s family will give back some of the gifts which will include two bottles of brandy and two bottles of orange syrup. The groom’s family also will receive two phoenix candles that will be lighted later by the bride’s side of the family.

The wedding day is a beautiful ceremony but before that something else happens. Why does the bride enter the groom’s home under the pants of the elder brother?